An appropriate joke

Story from a Kansas State
Highway Patrol officer :

I made a traffic stop on an elderly lady the other day for speeding
on U.S. 166 Eastbound at Mile Marker 73 just East of Sedan, KS.
I asked for her driver's license, registration, and proof of insurance.
The lady took out the required information and handed it to me.
In with the cards I was somewhat surprised (due to her advanced age)
to see she had a conceal carry permit. I looked at her and ask if
she had a weapon in her possession at this time.

She responded that she indeed had a .45 automatic in her glove box.
Something---body language, or the way she said it---made me want
to ask if she had any other firearms. She did admit to also having
a 9mm Glock in her center console. Now I had to ask one more
time if that was all. She responded once again that she did have
just one more, a .38 special in her purse. I then asked her what
was she so afraid of.

She looked me right in the eye and said, "Not a fucking thing!"

GO GRANNY, GO GRANNY, GO GRANNY, GO!

A big Texan stopped at a local restaurant following a day roaming around in Mexico.

While sipping his tequila, he noticed a sizzling, scrumptious looking platter being served at the next table.

Not only did it look good, the smell was wonderful.

He asked the waiter, 'What is that you just served?'


The waiter replied, 'Ah senor, you have excellent taste! Those are
called Cojones de Toro, bull's testicles from the bull fight this morning.

A delicacy!'

The cowboy said, 'What the heck, bring me an order.'


The waiter replied, 'I am so sorry senor. There is only one serving per day because there is only one bull fight each morning.

If you come early and place your order, we will be sure to save you this delicacy.'

The next morning, the cowboy returned, placed his order, and that evening was served the one and only special delicacy of the day.

After a few bites and inspecting his platter, he called to the waiter and said, 'These are delicious, but they are much, much smaller than the ones I saw you serve yesterday.'

The waiter shrugged his shoulders and replied, 'Si, Senor.'


"Sometimes the bull wins."
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