Murphy's law

MURPHY'S LAW
Two women were sitting next to each other at a bar. After a while one looks
at the other and says, 'I can't help but think, from listening to you, that
you're from Ireland."

The other woman responds proudly, 'Yes, I sure am!'

The first one says, 'So am I! And where about in Ireland are ya from?

The other woman answers, 'I'm from St. John's, I am.'

The first one responds, 'So, am I!! And what street did you live on?'

The other woman says, 'A lovely little area it was in the west end. I lived
on Warbury Street in the old central part of town.'

The first one says, 'Faith and it's a small world. So did I! So did I!
And what school did ya go to?'

The other woman answers, 'Well now, I went to Holy Heart of Mary, of
course.'

The first one gets really excited and says, 'And so did I. Tell me, what
year did you graduate?'

The other woman answers, 'Well, now, let's see. I graduated in 1964.'

The first woman exclaims, 'The Good Lord must be smiling down upon us! I can
hardly believe our good luck at winding up in the same pub tonight.
Can you believe it, I graduated from Holy Heart of Mary in 1964 me self.'

About this time, Michael walks into the bar, sits down and orders a beer.

Brian, the bartender, walks over to Michael, shaking his head and mutters,
'It's going to be a long night tonight.'

Michael asks, 'Why do you say that, Brian?'

Brian answers, 'The Murphy twins are drunk again.'

Tiff With Riley :lol:

My god! What happened to you?" the bartender asked Kelly as he hobbled in on a crutch, one arm in a cast.

"I got in a tiff with Riley."

"Riley? He's just a wee fellow," the barkeep said surprised.

"He must have had something in his hand."

"That he did," Kelly said. "A shovel it was."

"Dear Lord. Didn't you have anything in your hand?"

"Aye, that I did--Mrs. Riley's left tit." Kelly said. "And a beautiful thing it was, but not much use in a fight!"

ROTFLMAO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!