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The Great Pumpkin??

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Post by CanuckBob on Fri Oct 28, 2011 8:40 pm

In summary, the police arrested Patrick Lawrence, 22 year old white male, in a pumpkin patch 11:38 pm on Friday night.

On Monday, at the courthouse, Lawrence was charged with lewd and lascivious behavior, public indecency, and public intoxication.

The suspect explained that as he was passing a pumpkin patch on his way home from a drinking session when he decided to stop...

"You know how a pumpkin is soft and squishy inside, and there was no one around for miles, or at least I thought there wasn't anyone around" he stated in an interview.

Lawrence went on to say that he pulled over to the side of the road, picked out a pumpkin that he felt was appropriate to his
purpose; cut a hole in it, and proceeded to satisfy his alleged need. 'Guess I was really into it, you know?' he commented with evident embarrassment.

In the process of doing the deed, Lawrence failed to notice an approaching police car and was unaware of his audience until
Officer Brenda Taylor approached him.

'It was an unusual situation, that's for sure,' said Officer Taylor. 'I walked up to Lawrence and he's just banging away at this pumpkin.' Officer Taylor went on to describe what happened when she approached Lawrence .....

I said, 'Excuse me Sir, but do you realize that you're having sex with a pumpkin..??'

He froze, and was clearly very surprised that I was there, and then he looked me straight in the face and said, 'A pumpkin?
Shit ..... is it midnight already?'

This was in the Washington Post... the title of the article was "Best Come Back Line Ever."
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Post by ferret on Fri Oct 28, 2011 9:09 pm

Is that where pumpkin pie got its origin?
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Post by CanuckBob on Fri Oct 28, 2011 9:51 pm

Just hope he didn't "squash" it.............. Shocked
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